Sunday, May 22, 2011

Graduation & The Guts to Reveal My Life Story


Guess what I finally got to get dressed in? I can hardly believe that 2 years have come and gone and that I am officially an MBA graduate! It's been a tough 2 years sleeping only 4-5 hours a night while working as a teacher and going to class/studying all afternoon into the late hours of the night.

I'm applauding any/all readers who have patiently stayed with me during this random posting period in my life. You are SO amazing! Thanks for keeping me in the blogging world even when there was so little time!

Forgive me for getting personal, but I actually feel really strongly that I should. If I can share this with one person and inspire them, it is all worth it! I don't usually open up a lot about my life online, just my fashion finds, but I think blogging has made such a positive serious impact on my life I want to be sentimental for a moment. I started Igetdressed in 2009, just as I decided to study for the GMAT and make some serious life changes. At the ripe age of 26 I was going through a divorce after living with an abusive husband who constantly told me I wasn't good enough, pretty enough, and particularly smart enough. A masters degree had always been a dream of mine, but a dream that was crushed as I graduated from my bachelors and was married.
I don't think anyone goes into an abusive relationship knowing it will end up that way. I thought my ex was amazing, and so did all my family and friends. It took a few years with a lot of damage to my self-esteem to discover he was living a double life full of affairs, debts, and serious pornography addictions. I am someone who believes marriage is eternal and I did my best to stick it out even though it was constantly getting worse. When I discovered he had lied about attending college that I personally paid his tuition on and had withdrawn and pocketed money, I knew something was seriously wrong. My life was threatened and I felt manipulated to stay with him .
I feel God saved me by letting him join the military and me moving to AZ to be near family to see that someone threatening and abusing was indeed what was taking place. He was having an affair too, which I caught, and he immediately abandoned me.
I was a victim, in the worst degree with a completely broken and shattered life at only age 26. I felt so alone, and so trapped in a negative life that I did not choose.

But one day I looked at my life and thought "I'm not going to be a victim, I'm going to be a success. I'm not going to let him ruin me anymore!" I decided to dream big, and business school was a big dream for any woman as the minority, but particularly for someone who had been through so much abuse in every form. After filing for divorce I started studying for the GMAT, and I started this blog to encourage myself I was worthwhile, and honestly to make friends at the lowest point of my life. I bombed the GMAT the first time and thought life was over again. I had a friend tell me that if I wasn't willing to do all it took, I didn't deserve my dream. Harsh words, but SO true! Knowing that 90% of people who re-take one month later get the same score or lower, I risked it. It paid off- I earned a MUCH higher score and was admitted to a top 30 University within weeks! I chose ASU to be close to family as I healed.

It's amazing what 2 years can do! I am happily re-married (something I never expected or knew I even wanted until Mr. Perfect came along), I am jumping into my dream career, and I have so much self-esteem knowing I conquered the demons someone else put in my path. I know education is so important, and I honestly believe it is a achievable, even if it takes years to get into the school or program you want.

I hope there is at least one reader out there who knows they can overcome those demons that tell women we aren't pretty enough, smart enough, good enough, etc. and know that YOU CAN DO ANYTHING IF YOU PUT YOUR MIND TO IT! You can heal from divorce, you can go to Harvard, you can be the greatest Mom, you can love again, you can be beautiful at any body size/shape, and you can be so happy!

Thanks again for all the readers old and new who have supported me in my lowest time of life, and have cheered my recent marriage and graduation. I love the positivity in blogging, and from personal experience I can tell you, it's so needed in this world!

11 comments:

  1. You are amazing. Glad you had guts and a great family to support you through all this! Love ya!

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  2. wow amazing story. Love you girl. You are strong and I cant imagine going thru soemthing like this. trust me god was watching and helped you find new love someone who care about you.

    xo Nav
    http://navlandstyle.blogspot.com/

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  3. Wow, knowing your story makes reading your blog even more enjoyable. Congratulations on your many accomplishments!

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  4. Thanks for sharing something that is so private and personal. Your story is so inspiring.

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  5. You come off as so confident and gorgeous that I would have never known. You've been able to achieve so much through your hard work- others would have just let that sort of negative experience let their life stagnate.

    Be doubly proud of yourself. I am!

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  6. Thank you for sharing your story, and being so open and honest! I've always loved your blog, but I love it even more now to know that such a strong, motivated & awesome woman is behind it!

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  7. Thanks for all the sweet, positive comments!

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  8. You are such an inspiration. Your courage to live the life you want and to share your story with us is more than admirable. Congrats, graduate!!!

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  9. Thank you for sharing. Congrats on the graduation!

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  10. First time visiting here, but I was touched to read your story. I wish it was the first like it that I've ever heard, but I'm sad to say I've heard of extreme deception in marriage so much lately. I'm sorry it happened to you. And GOOD FOR YOU to rise above and to BECOME. :)

    I've got to go back and read the rest of your blog now. :)

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  11. Thaks for sharing your inspiring story! =) greetigns from Mexico city.

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